Because we all know you came here to learn about the boys of F.A.L.S. here is a quick rundown of all active members.
Fruity Bios
REGINALD McBUTTERFACE- A classically trained ballet dancer from the upper west side, Reginald studied ballet dance and modern dance at the Juliard in New York. Says his biggest influences are Christopher Walken and Jim J Bullock. Plays bass guitar, xylophone and lends vocals to nearly every "Ass" song. Was involved in the infamous Arkansas ping pong paddle dance fight of '98. (pictured top right; pictured bottom right w/ white pants)
RUDEGUR FORTNIGHT-A transient that grew up Oliver Twist style, living with and stealing from whoever he could. Was an international pornstar in Kuala Lumpar, Malaysia before hitting it big with F.A.L.S. His musical influences are Air Supply, Jefferson Starship and Traci Lords. Was also part of the dance fight. Plays the spoons, the washboard and lends vocals as well. (pictured bottom right, far right)
JUSTIN YORBUT-WHOLE- Hailing from rebuilt Prussia, he gaves the band that "Eastern Europe Country that doesn't exist anymore" flavor. Holds the largest collection of spoken word albums, and wears a size 18 shoe. His biggest influence is the poetry of John Keats(pictured bottom right, w/ striped shirt)
CONSTANTINE BRANCUZZI, JR.- Once told Elton John he, "Didn't like homos" and punched him in the face. Not much else. Oh yeah, one time he saw a blimp.
ELLIOT VON HABERDASHERY- He is the illegitamate child of Wilt Chamberlain and a Lousiana hooker. As many talents, including but not limited to...drawing a penis with a pencil in his toes, and putting his penis between his toes.
TRENTON ROSS DAVIS- Died 1998 and 1996.
